


Love is a chemical reaction

by Mike_t_k6



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Angst, Asexual Character, Fluff, Harassment, M/M, Sexual Harassment
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:00:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26897815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mike_t_k6/pseuds/Mike_t_k6
Summary: Izaya has never experienced love... Well not until he meant Shizuo Heiwajima.
Relationships: Heiwajima Shizuo/Orihara Izaya
Comments: 6
Kudos: 41





	1. Like a drug

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoy!! ❤

Love? What is love? 

Noun. An intense feeling of deep affection. 

Well, that's what the definition stated. Nonetheless, when the feeling sets in... All definitions are thrown out the window. It doesn't feel like reality. It clouds your judgment, you act differently around the person, and you start to feel... Stupid. Like a drug. Ah, Let's take ecstasy for example! Dopamine for an increase in energy and activities, as well as bringing positive reinforcement to the brain. Norepinephrine increases heart rate and blood pressure. (which can be risky.) Lastly, Serotonin affects mood, appetite, sleep, and other functions. (Sounds familiar?) It also triggers hormones for sexual behavior and trust. When it came to love, humans are the most intriguing. 

More and more examples were filling Izaya's mind as he goes deaf from the blood rushing through his body. Izaya couldn't stop these thoughts from forming and proceeding through motion. It had been bothering him, however, these thoughts couldn't come in the worst timing. People shouted in pure anger from almost colliding with the informant broker. His head wasn't in the moment. Although that didn't stop Shizuo from chasing Izaya anyway. "IIIZZZZAAAYYYAAAAAA!!" Ba-Thump. 

Izaya cursed the way his body betrayed him. The warmth that now takes hold of his cheeks, while his breathing quickens, and heart-thumping trying to escape his chest cavity. When did his feelings for Shizu-chan start? Nothing came up, deep down he knew that they were always there. Just growing. Izaya shook off the thought and started to nibble on the inside of his cheek. A single glanced to his rear and he couldn't help the biggest leap that his heart has ever done. Beads of sweat fell from Shizuo's hair while his eyes flare with passion or... Hate? Doesn't matter. The thought was cut short when Izaya felt pain and then darkness. The object that was thrown was not seen by the brunette. 

Darkness swarm around Izaya's body. The only thing he can feel was the pounding in his head. Pain mixed with anger as he wanted to hit himself for making such a foolish mistake. He wouldn't be surprised if this was death. This was the first time Shizuo had caught him. It took everything for Izaya to open his eyes, blinking to adjust to the light. The surface that he was laying wasn't a hard ground but a soft bed. 'Where did that, brute, take me?' The room was quaint and quiet, except for steady breathing. Izaya looked over to his right to see Shizuo dozing off on a chair next to his bed. Instead of waking him up, Izaya just sat back to admire him. Shizu-chan looked so peaceful, his hair draped over his eye and his lips look so soft. Izaya let out a huffed and mumbled, "Shut up." Izaya ruffled his hair in frustration, feeling bandages.

The action stopped when he heard an irritated grunt. Izaya didn't dare look up to meet Shizuo's gaze. This moment couldn't get any worse. "I'm sorry." Izaya gazed up hard-hitting toward the blonde man. 

Shizuo kept his eyes down and hand on the back of his neck. He seemed sincerely apologetic. Izaya couldn't help the laugh that erupted from him. "A monster can't be 'Sorry'." The vain that popped from Shizuo's head was enough to keep Izaya on guard. 

"Oh, Shizu-chan, you do not need to apologize. You often wanted to kill. I'm disappointed." Izaya smirked as he spoke, "You had your chance to exterminate me but you didn't take it. Why?"

Shizuo's eyes move to lock onto Izaya's and a growl could be heard. "You know saying 'Thank you' wouldn't kill you, flea." Izaya raised a brow and watched as Shizuo took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. 

Izaya was ready to snap out a snarky remark when Shizuo continued to speak. "I thought I killed you. I should have felt happy when I saw you on the ground motionless but I didn't. I was..." It wasn't hard to know what Shizuo wanted to say, the fear in his eyes gave it away.

No, he shouldn't be acting so... Human! His eyes showed regret, sorrow, and something else that the informant broker can't pinpoint. The brute's hand shook and his left leg bounced. Like he needed a smoke. 'Was Shizu-chan really worried about me?' Izaya's heart started to speed up when he felt a hand on his own. 

The smaller man snatched his hand away, not wanting to admit to his failure. "Listen closely, Flea, if you tell anyone about this. I will actually kill you." Izaya ignored what Shizuo said, he was too caught up in his thoughts to care. 

He shouldn't have emotions. He's a monster, but why did the Informant broker feel like his heart couldn't slow down. His mind felt foggy and couldn't stop focusing on the rumble of Shizuo's deep voice. This left the informant broker speechless and a blush started to bloom on his cheeks. It took everything not to stutter or sound weak as he said, "Are you sick, Shizu-chan? Or do you think it's funny to mess with me?" A bit of venom to seal the deal. 

Shizuo was about to protest but got interrupted when the door to the room opened. "Ah, Izaya you're awake! I was surprised to see Shizuo carrying you! How are you feeling?" Izaya tsk at Shinra's concern.

"A little dizzy but I can live. May I leave now? This whole situation is boring to me." Shinra grinned and help Izaya up while Shizuo watched. 

-

The night was loud and bright. People laughed while they shopped with their friends. Today would have been a wonderful day to watch the people around him. Regardless, Izaya didn't feel like dealing with the bright lights and loud people. His focus lingered on his hand. The part of his hand that tingled with the memory of Shizuo's touch. Izaya didn't realize how long he was thinking until it dawned on him that he was already home. Inside his house was the same as when he left. Only that Namie wasn't there, he was out for most of the day. So he's not surprised. 

The informant broker skims through his nightly routine and lay down onto his bed. He flips open his phone and saw that the Dollars had posted. Curiosity pulled at Izaya's mind as he opened the post. Dread and embarrassment quickly flooded Izaya's body. The picture was of Shizuo carrying Izaya in his arms... How a husband would carry his wife. The caption also read, 'Look what I saw today! Do you think they look kinda cute together?' Under the post comments, were filled with all types of opinions, some who agreed and others that didn't. All in all, it was Chaos.


	2. Too far for comfort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shinra tries to give Izaya advice. 
> 
> Celty is just confused! 
> 
> Izaya might have poked the beast too roughly...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you all know, being Asexual can differ from person to person. This is just how I am. 😅 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!!!❤

Did you all know you can find love in every culture! Of course, you know! Why wouldn't you! It's a constant theme, something you can't escape. Songs, films, and novels. No escape. Still, why does it scare people? Love can be platonic, sexual, or romantic. The word love can be used for anything! Depending on what you're talking about. Have you noticed that everyone always strives for sexual and romantic love? Why not have just one or all 3? Aren't friends enough? No, of course not. Not for a human's vigorous mind because one day those friends might leave and who would you have left. 

That thought stopped by three words. Three words. Three words are all that takes to ruin Izaya's day.

'Touched by love...'  
'Touched... By... Love...'

What does that even mean? 

Tired eyes skimmed the words with a slight twitch. 3 sleepless nights and barely getting work done, Izaya was at the ends of his rope. After day four of trying to get the image that haunts his awake and dreams, Izaya did the one thing he knew best. This habit started back in his school days when he first met Shizuo. The feeling was something he never felt before. That day he thought he was sick or dying. Nobody told him how it felt to have a crush on someone. Well, nothing needed to be explained in the first place. Everyone just knew. He searched for his symptoms and found there was no cure. That didn't stop him from searching. "Are you even paying attention?" Izaya barely acknowledged the dark-haired woman and continued to open tab number 7.

Namie's eyes bore into Izaya's skull. She loved the quiet, yet, the informant broker was unsightly. He was skinnier than usual, his hair stood out against his pale skin and the bags under his eyes were apparent. "Namie, you know I find you tedious when you talk about your incestuous love for your brother." Izaya didn't give a second glance when he heard a huff, slam, and then footsteps making their way over to his desk.

"I was saying you look like shit, you buffoon! You haven't left your apartment in weeks. The quiet is enjoyable but if you send me out again to get groceries you barely even touch then I'll..." She takes a rough breath and leans forward in a seething whisper, "I'll burn you in your bed. I am not your Errand Girl."

The pale man rolled his eyes, recognizing that the threat was meaningless. "Namie, you're so sweet to me. How about you go home early today. I'll finish the last of the work." Namie scoffed and shuffle out, not wanting to stay longer than she wished for.

Finally, the room was empty. Little to no work was done. He blinked at the search bar and contemplate on what to search. Finally, he gave up and decided to go out for a change. 

-

Knock. Knock. Knock. 

It took every bit of strength to make it to Shinra's place. Izaya was hungry and tired. Still, he knew the only way to put his mind at ease was to talk about his emotions. 'How demeaning.' A sigh of disappointment left his lips when the doctor opened the door. He was hoping for Celty since she had a knack of not annoying the hell out of him. "Is Celty here?" Shinra's wide grin didn't help his predicament. 

"Nope, she is out on a job! What brings you-" Shinra stopped as he took a good look at the informant broker. "Izaya, you look pale and skinny?! Come in!" Izaya ignored the comment as he was dragged inside.

Shinra sat Izaya on the table and made his way to the kitchen but not without asking a few questions. "How long haven't you eaten? Have you slept either?" Izaya's mind buffer for a little, being sleep deprived didn't help him process information. He was at a loss.

That didn't stop the doctor from asking again. The only answer he got was '3 days' and 'No', not specifying how many sleepless days. Shinra quickly made what he could find to give to Izaya. He opted for a simple fruit salad. Shinra studied Izaya while he ate, his features stuck in an unreadable expression. Something you barely see the doctor do. "Is this about your crush on, Shizuo?" The statement made Izaya almost choke on the fruit that he's been chewing. Feeling disgruntle when the fruit didn't kill him.

Shinra had known Izaya before Shizuo, he was even there when he came out as Asexual. For Izaya, sex is pointless and he never even gave it a second thought. Although that didn't stop his romantic attraction from acting up. Izaya suddenly found his lap more interesting. Tracing the feature on his hand. "Izaya, we've been friends for a long time. You think I didn't notice when you use to watch Shizuo from afar. Surely, it wouldn't go unnoticed." Izaya felt his stomach churn and thought that maybe Shinra wasn't too awful to confide in. 

"This stays between us." Shinra smiled widen and he got up with a start. 

The doctor ran to the kitchen once again and it was Izaya's turn to ask a query... 'What are you...' Izaya didn't finish when Shinra said, "I'm making some tea! I have been waiting for this day to come!" Izaya rolled his eyes but felt a smile pulled at his features, even if Shinra can't see from the kitchen.

-

"Have you ever tried talking to him... Nicely?" Shinra laughed nervously while Izaya glowered at him. 

The informant broker had spent a good hour ranting about his week. It all started with a stupid photo. Izaya's hand gripped the cup of tea, he's done that a couple of duration during their talk, now becoming a comfort from time to time. Izaya let out a low sigh and sank into his seat. "I can't. Shinra, I stick with real things. Usually, facts and figures, when information is in its place then it's easier for me to figure out what happens next." Izaya didn't want to admit to being scared of what Shizu-chan would think of him if he got to honestly know him.

"Izaya, you're the most human I know. You guys are both emotional people and I think if you give each other a chance, you won't regret it." The doctor was startled back into his seat when Izaya stood aggressively and moved to pace the room. 

Izaya looked hysterical, his hands found themselves gripping his raven locks. "What if when he knows me, he's only disappointed! And I can't run from it! What happens then? He doesn't want me around. He told me himself!" Shinra listened to Izaya, holding onto every word that slipped from his lips.

"Don't you think you're being a little defensive?" The informant broker turned and scowled at Shinra. 

"No, I'm being cautious! He hates my guts and he's always saying how he wants me dead! I'm just a flea to him." Shinra's face twisted from confusion to compassion, he never seen Izaya so troubled.

What Shinra did next was something he never did for Izaya. He wrapped his arm around him, not too tight to make him uncomfortable. Izaya stiffened but allowed his friend to hold him. "Izaya, if he got to know you as I did. I know he'll love what he sees." Tears threaten to spill onto his cheeks but the mood was cut short when they heard the door to the apartment open. Shinra let go and ran to welcome his queen. "Celty you're home early! Oh- Shizuo's with you... Shizuo!? Did you get stabbed!?" Izaya squeaked and made his way to the couch and hope they wouldn't notice he was there. 

Celty was the first to walk into the room, the helmet tilting in confusion. They stared at each other giving Izaya time to compose himself. Celty took out her PDA and walked over to Izaya. [Are you okay? You look distressed.] That was putting it lightly. 

The informant meant to respond to the woman before him, sadly, life wanted to fuck with Izaya. Instead, they looked toward the entrance of the room to hear yelling and something or someone being dragged. Shinra was gripping Shizuo telling him to wait. Obviously, failing. "Flea? Why is he here?!" Izaya flinched at the name and felt himself get light headed. 

This was too much. He can't take any more of this. He tried to get up, not realizing that his body met the floor. Izaya was still conscious, just weak to get up or open his eyes. The feeling of a hand on his head made him flinched. "Izaya, when was the last time you slept?" The Doctor was asking the same question, surely not expecting any response.

This was the second time that Izaya had a blackout in front of Shizuo. It was unfair. The darkness seized hold of his consciousness, the only difference was he started to feel light and warm. Izaya snuggled close to the warmth and tried to grip the heat source. "Stop that." Izaya's eyes flew open, the horror in front of him made him squirm. 

"Put me down, you beast! Are you taking me to your monster cave so you can ravage me?!" Shizuo growled at the words and feeling the weak hits to his chest.

Shizuo looked pretty pissed before, probably, caused by the stabbed wounds that we're already wrapped up. That didn't distract the fact that they were once again out in public with Shizuo carrying him. "I can walk myself! Put me down!" That was a lie, Izaya felt groggy and shaky. He proceeded to blindly grip at his switchblade that should have been in his pocket. Things can't get any worst. The blonde looked to be in thought, possibly debating if he should drop him or put him down lightly.

Izaya's feet met the ground only for him to almost tumble down if it weren't for the arm around him. The stream of curses left Izaya's lips when he was thrown over Shizuo's shoulder. "Quit being a pest. Shinra told me to take you home." Of course, this was Shinra's idea. 

Shizuo sighed and looked away, having a visible light flush on his face. Possibly from losing too much blood. "You better start getting better. I don't want to kill you if you can barely hold yourself up." 

Izaya didn't know if being thrown over Shizuo's shoulder caused him to be upset because it broke his last shred of decency or maybe he whiplashed. Izaya chose to go with whiplash. He understood that he felt delicate like he can break at any second. The emotions and stress were becoming too much for the Informant broker. Izaya could feel the prick of his tears trying to escape. The talk with Shinra likely made him a little more sensitive than usual. The raven hair will not give Shizu-chan satisfaction. He will not cry in front of this brute! He gazed at Shizuo's back watching the cloth of the bartender uniform move with every stride. The silence grew between the two as they near Izaya's flat. Izaya thought once they got to his building, Shizuo would drop him at the front. He was wrong. Shizuo continued to the elevator and waited to enter. "Hey, Protozoan, you can put me down now." No answer. Izaya would be lying if he said he wasn't slowly cherishing being held. 

Nonetheless, he wasn't going to admit to that. He tried to squirm out of the monstrous grip. No matter how much he struggled to escape, the monster's hold didn't loosen. They finally reach Izaya's door, a mute calm filling the air as they stood there. Nothing could prepare Izaya when he felt a hand feeling around his hip. The anxiety now sets his body on fire. The raven hair started to squirm even harder. 'No. Please, no!' "H-hey, stop! What are you doing?!" The motion abruptly stopped.

"Where are your keys?" It took the informant a minute to decompress and reach into his pocket. 

The room was quiet, still, Izaya's ear was filled with his heart drumming against his chest. 'Why is this caveman still here?!' Shizuo made his way in and up the stairs without permission from the man in his arms. "Shizu-chan, why are you doing this? You could have just dropped me on the couch." Shizuo only grunts in response. "I know your one brain cell is working hard to comprehend this, so just answer me best you can." If words could kill then Shizuo would be dead. This monster was toying with him and he didn't like to be toyed with.

Izaya gazed up to see Shizuo's vein-popping on his head. This gave Izaya joy as he continues. "Should I dumb it down for you? Why. Didn't. You. Just. Put. Me. On. The. Couch?" With every word, Izaya poked Shizuo on his neck.

With one clean swoop, Izaya was thrown onto his bed, not realizing that he was in his room already. Izaya glanced up once again to see Shizuo seething. He ground his teeth and smiled wickedly. "Say it again, I-za-ya!" Izaya felt his blood run cold.

Did he go too far?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might be getting another face piercing!! I am very tired but I am proud of this!


	3. This day can't get any worst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izaya is pulling out the big guns to distract himself from Shizuo but it seems like the universe is trying to mess with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoy it!❤
> 
> (Hey, if my writing doesn't tell you who is my favorite character is then I don't know what to tell you... I am so tired.👌🏾❤😚)

"Oh, Shizu-chan, always quick to temper. It's not my fault that your brain can't process simple words." Izaya kept his voice low to hide the quiver in his words.

This day was dragging out longer than he liked. All filter he had was out the window. The lack of food and sleep were weighing on him. Now Shizuo was going to murder him.

The room was quiet. Hazel eyes piercing Izaya's. The air felt thick and every inhale was getting harder to attain. Izaya then felt the bed shift from Shizuo's weight as he made his way towards him. Every sarcastic quip left his mind. He pales at the sight and whispered, "Shizuo," Which seemed to stop the monster in his track. Izaya's gaze shifted away from the hazelnut ones as he continued, "Stop. I'm not in the mood for our usual cat and mouse game." Shizuo would never change and Izaya would be a fool to think otherwise. It didn't take a lot for Shizuo to notice that Izaya was shaking.

He obliged and moved away from the informant's bed. "I'm sorry," he said before looking back. "I hope you feel better." The door closed and all enmity left the room. Izaya was able to finally release a shaky breath.

It took forever before Izaya regained a steady pace of breathing. However, his mind was fuzzy. The way Shizuo spoke before he left was almost alien. He saw Shizuo like this only once and that was in Shinra's room. 

Wait. How could he forget! The photo that was breaking the internet. No doubt there must be another after tonight. How could he be so careless? 

Izaya let out a sigh and buried his face into the pillow. He couldn't believe that he made a joke out of himself. Izaya's thought slowly faded as sleep took over his body. Izaya was sore and couldn't accept everything that happened until now.

~~~~~

"Iza-nii, I can't believe you came to visit us!" Izaya was starting to have second thoughts about coming to his sisters for a distraction. 

Their apartment was small but fair. A kitchen that can be seen from the living room and a tv that wasn't small but wasn't big either. Izaya sunk into the couch while Mairu hugged Kururi. Those two have been inseparable since birth. They were nightmares to raise, still, he doesn't love them any less. "Why?" The two Orihara's drew their sight to Kururi. 

"Yeah! Why are you choosing to visit us? You have never done this before! Are you trying to hide out from the Yakuza?" Mairu buzzed without taking a single breath.

Izaya smirked and gave a short laugh. "Can I not visit my sisters without having a reason." The twins eyed each other and glared back at Izaya. 

The glares were gone in a second as a grin took over their features. The twins made their way to Izaya's side. Hooking their arms around his. "Of course, a normal brother would but Iza-nii, you're not normal." Mairu gives a small squeeze to Izaya's arm. "Don't get the wrong idea, we're not complaining." That was unexpected, the girls always found new ways to surprise him.

"Let's go out." Kururi stood up and softly tugged at Izaya's sleeve. "Yeah! Let's go on a walk, Iza-nii! We can go to Russian Sushi!" Mairu was next to tug at Izaya but her tug yanked him out of his seat. Stumbling from the force and he was dragged right out the front door.

The scene happened so fast that Izaya didn't process that he was walking on a bustling street. Izaya relaxed under the touch of his sister's arms hooked around his. The bright look in their eyes was enough to warm his heart. It reminded him of when they were younger. Growing up was rough, he had to care for himself while also caring for the twins. Their parents would only come home for special occasions. But when they did visit they never gave Izaya and the twins any attention besides critiquing every detail they found wrong with them. Well, mostly him. Izaya didn't dare let his parents near his sisters. Even if it meant he got most of the blow. 

"IZA-YA!!" That broke Izaya from his thoughts. 

Izaya turned to see Shizuo holding a street sign with Vorona and Tom trailing behind him. Before Izaya could spit out a snappy remark his sister was making her way to the bartender. No fear and shouting his name like death wasn't an option. "Shizuo! Come with us to get some Russian Sushi!" Izaya couldn't believe what he was hearing. His sister didn't fear death because she was an absolute demon.

Shizuo stopped in his tracks almost like he was buffering to processes some simple words. Protozoan. "Mairu, see what you did? You've confused the beast. You know he can't understand big words." In the corner of his eye, he can see Tom flinch from the comment. 

Vorona on the other hand glared harder than she was before. If that's even possible but Izaya didn't care. Just knowing that nothing changed because of their interaction last night made his confidence grow. "How dare you insult, Shizuo." Awe, how sweet. Izaya gut twisted with disgust as he rolled his eyes at Vorona. She took a few steps forward until she was stopped by an arm. 

"It's fine, Vorona." Shizuo didn't look as angry as before. His eyes latched onto Izaya's and they said nothing about what he was planning on doing next. "Tom, how many stops do we have left?" 

Shizuo dropped the sign and turn slightly to look straight at his boss. He didn't give any mind to Mairu hooking her arm with his as she waited for Tom's answer. Kururi was still gripping Izaya and that gave him some comfort at the moment. "We only have two more. Shizuo you're not thinking of joining, Izaya?" Shizuo shrugged and lit a cigarette with no struggle from the girl at his side. 

"Russian Sushi." Kururi caught the group's attention. Tom took one look at Kururi and knew he wasn't going to win in this situation. He agreed in defeat and they start to make their way to the restaurant.

Izaya and Shizuo were ahead with the twins still clutching to them. Tom and Vorona were tailing behind chatting. With the occasional glares, from Vorona to Izaya. The silent threat was ignored by the raven hair. Izaya grimaced and mumbled, "I can't believe I'm having lunch with this monster." Nobody seemed to notice, well, that's what he assumed. Izaya proved wrong when he felt someone watching him. 

His eyes locked onto the hazel ones. This day can't get any worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I've been kind of going for a while. I've been busy but don't think for a second that I am giving up on this fanfic!!! 😤❤

**Author's Note:**

> I learned that Izaya is asexual and I feel so happy because I am asexual myself. Representation is so important and I think we need more of it.


End file.
